Depression is common’ – the true reality of this statement is sad. So many people suffer with depression or know someone who is suffering. A lot of people misuse the word. Depression comes about from low mood and some other symptoms these symptoms include:
- Consistent low mood or sadness( crying or just feeling sad )
- Not wanting to do things you’d usually do, like your favourite hobbies.
- Not being able to sleep or sleeping for longer periods of time then normal.
- Change in your diet, sometimes you don’t eat as much and lost weight or comfort eat and gain weight.
- Feeling tired or lack or energy Feeling worthless and sometimes guilty.
- Thoughts of dying, not being bothered of you live or die. If you feel you are depressed or think someone close to is, tell someone. A parent, GP, friend Ect. It could safe yours or their life. The sooner they get help the sooner they will recover.
Even before I suffered with depression I struggled with my feelings. I’d cry a lot, stay in bed and not want to move, I’d basically given up. That’s when I realised I was depressed. Something I’d never suffered with for 14 years previously of my life. But here I was a 14 year old girl lying in bed scrunched up a in a ball with tears rolling down my face 24/7 wondering why I was still living. I guess it all started after I was in this relationship that was abusive, controlling and horrible. I could get into the relationship but it’s a whole over thing. It left me a empty shell of a person,scared of my own shadow, I was so unhappy for such a long time, I’m still not fully recovered. A couple weeks after the breakup I wanted to die. I tried so many times and when it didn’t work I’d actually feel even more unhappy that I wasn’t dead and this torture of the aftermath of the relationship was lingering around me like a bad smell. I spent all these days in bed, in foetus position balling like a baby and when I’d stop for a little while but then I’d remember again, get flash backs and id start crying again. It was so bad 😦 . My parents decided it was time to see the doctor because they was concerned, I wasn’t going to school and I’d still be trying to kill my self. I was depressed, I wish I could say counselling worked for me at first but it didn’t 😦 . It took a long time to be able to talk openly about what happened. The worst part was that a numbered amount of people didn’t believe me, or thought it was my fault and it hurt me so much inside because it wasn’t my fault and so much of me wanted it not to be real. But it was an I had to deal with it or it could ruin my future. I got better after a while but it didn’t last, after my dad’s death I went straight back into my depression, this time I got professional help from KOOTH which is a online counselling for teenagers. A lady came out every week to talk to me right until the day I left high school. For once someone was listening to me, believing me, understanding, I’d needed that for so long. My dad’s death brought back my nightmares and I started to sleepwalk which I’d never done before? I know that depression can be so hard for some people, I was told I was doing amazingly well just getting out of bed in the morning. Getting out of bed in the morning was the most horrific thing I had to do everyday at the time. Iv been told that depression is a common ‘side effect’ or PDS of abuse. I suffered from a lot of PDS during the months after the breakup. Im finally recovering after a year and a half, some days are better then others but I’m a happier person now.
There was a couple of things that helped me, and maybe it could help you?
1. Realising it’s NOT your fault- I can’t count the amount of times iv read or experienced the feeling some people think it’s your fault. Well it’s not! Don’t listen to people who say it’s your fault in any way because once you understand it’s wasn’t your fault. You can start to move forward. Don’t feel qulity for things, this will increase your depression and self worth.
2. Talk to someone – talking to someone helped me a lot once I found the right person to talk to. It could be anyone a school mentor, a friend, a family member, or someone on the internet like a councillor if that Is more comfortable for you.
3. It’s okay to be upset – I had people telling me that I needed to stop crying, and others telling me it’s okay to cry sometimes and I just want to say that it is okay to cry sometimes. You can let feelings out will crying and it could make you feel a little better after a cry. Just try a pick a place and time that is safe for you to have a cry because sometimes you just need to be alone or maybe be with someone who can support you.
4. Someone loves you. Someone needs you. Someone cares. When you’re depressed it is easy to think that your not loved, wanted or cared for but that’s not true because someone does. Try and stay away from negative thoughts and think positive. I used to love to think about the good things in my life, like the fact I’d be going to college soon and starting my adult future and it helped me. Anything that helps you. There’s so many things to look forward to even If you don’t think there is. Make something to look forward too even if it’s a small thing.
5. Don’t try and kill yourself. Like I said someone loves you, needs you, cares. If you was to die or be in serous danger they would be broken. Trust me I know this from personal experience. If you feel lost and that it’s the only option then talk to someone.. Call a hotline, talk to a friend. We all need you here. Your very important.
‘Nothing haunts us like the things we don’t say’
If you suffer with depression or no-one who does, then I hope you understand you are never alone.. Comment below.
*disclaimer* – I am in no way a professional. Everything said is my own opinion and advice given is either advice I have been told and helped me or advice from my experiences. I do not own any picture or videos in this blog. I hope this help you :)!